Gli italiani calceranno dell'asino francese stasera!

Aaah.. My Liverpool/England supporting friend Tariq left to England a week ago or so, he's doing his Masters there.. He's also watching the world cup from there.. He sent us this email which I thought was really hilarious!


TEN REASONS WHY ITALY MIGHT WIN THE WORLD CUP..

1) Fifa worked very hard to promote fair play and anti racism in the world cup.. as we all saw.. there were banners and slogans all over the place and in the latter rounds team captains were given little notes to read out.. but Fifa were apparently also promoting homosexuality.. and in an effort to stamp homophobia out of the beautiful game.. they decided on helping the team with the biggest number of homosexual players win the tournament.. so congratulations to Gigi, Pippo, and Gattuso.. your sexual orientation might just win your country the world cup..!!

2) As part of their preparation for the world cup tournament, the whole Italian team had been subjected to long hours of hypnotic therapy, their conditioning was to try and get all the players to change their attitudes from playing really badly, losing, and blaming everyone else for cheating and being unfair to playing good football and winning.

3) Italy scored a lot of goals, due to the fact that 15 out of the 23 players selected for the squad were strikers.

4) They have a really cool team doctor.. the skinny guy with a little moustache and protective glasses.. check him out in the final.. hehe..

5) Ukraine player Andrey Schevshenko’s family were entertaining some guests when Ukraine and Italy met in the quarter finals.. The friendly mafia mobsters decided to watch the game at his home in Italy with his wife and son.. just to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid during the game.. like scoring against them for example..

6) Instead of spending a large number of hours training on improving certain skills and techniques the Italians are good at such as ‘falling over in agony’ and the ‘I didn’t touch him look’ and ‘he was pulling my shirt’.. the Italian coach decided it was time for a change and introduced new skills and techniques for the players to adopt.. such as heading, shooting, and passing.. midfielder Gattuso missed that training session..

7) Match fixing can be done internationally as well as locally.. as the world will discover in a few months..

8) The real Ronaldinho stayed at home to work on his modeling career.. and sent his twin brother (who was shit at football) to take his place in the Brazil squad..

9) Ghana, United States, Australia, Ukraine, and Germany are all crap at football.. and the Czechs didn’t have any fit strikers for the game.. so I suppose the Italians were just simply very lucky..

10) Well.. maybe it was just because they played really good football.. good attacking positive play originating from a solid group of defenders.. good squad selection and rotation.. good ‘keeper.. and a good team doctor.. THERE.. I said it.. Happy?
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'sigh'.. Tonight is the big night.. Tonight, the dream either begins or ends..
Stasera, il sogno si inizia o finisce..
Ce soir, le rêve commence ou termine..
I can't wait.. Viva Italia! :D